30th/31st January

Last night’s thought were here, there, and everywhere; from feelings and emotions to random thoughts. Here is my second post of my insomniac ramblings.

Tonight I’m unsure why I’m lying awake.

I feel really lonely. I feel/fear people don’t want to be my friend. I have a massive fear of rejection so when I feel lonely it really hits deep.

I want to sleep. Being so tired during the day really gets me down and I don’t enjoy things.

I googled cute animals tonight. Wasn’t disappointed. Probably my favourite ever Google search.

I was staring at my lava lamp, trying to relax and thought ‘it looks like lava’ then realised that’s why it’s called a LAVA LAMP.

I can’t believe I forgot to tell Dr S about this bout of insomnia. I wish I’d mentioned it and got some decent sleeping tablets. Stupid!

Might attempt to sleep soon though I’m restless. But I feel tired.

Song in my head: All things bright and beautiful…….. why? Is there some psychological reason this is in my head? Alters [I have DID, hear voices/have alternative personalities] reminding me I’m classed as “all things/creatures” and I’m bright and beautiful, great and small, wise and wonderful….. gosh I’m fabulous, thanks alters!

I wonder what note/tone my yawn is? I’m gonna guess D major.

When people say “that cracked me up” I just wanna ask them if they’re called Humpty Dumpty.

Do birds not have ankles, or not have knees?

So, as you can see, my thoughts are absolutely random when I can’t see.

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